Monday, March 27, 2017



Years have past.
I'm ready to write again.
A new definition of myself as a mother
Looking to support and change
the definition of being a boy a man.
My definition  the definition in the world
in the face of the imbalance of genders
of society or culture or some thing
trying to change it for girls 
make it better empower them
and boys being lost in the change 
not knowing who or what or how

And I too not knowing who or what or how 
to support
to love
to open the balance
not mother and nurture too much 
but to see his tears and his strength
his vulnerability and feelings 

They are so real and good and not 
to be afraid of them 
Draw them and dance them
sing them and write them.


Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Homage to Marie



The cawing birds, 
 they squealed,  they squawked,  
they flew, they loved, they ate,
 they watched, 
 they lived. 

I loved the birds watching the sea, 
 the waves coming in, 
 looking for food.
 Or were they
 like us,  
just watching the sea roll in
 to offer it's rhythm, 
blessings,  
it's power, 
 magnificence,  
mindlessness
 overpowering 
magnitude 
Offering us healing
 and washing.  
indispensable water
Water,  water everywhere
rolling,  breaking,  flying 
in unison, 
 the starlings 
(or were they pipers)  
endless squeaks of calling birds,  
flying to the heavens
floating in the pools
of salted water
looking at the roofless vision 
of the sky 
the stars,  
the heavens. 
I feel I'm in heaven. 
I am in heaven. 
Heaven is. 
Is it fiction,  mama?  
heaven is real. 
hell is fiction. 
hell is real. 

he is at this age
he asks these questions 
I wonder why he doesn't know. 
He teaches me so. 

I feel like a bad mother 
I have not taught him
heaven hell adam eve
who are they
I wonder myself. 
son of adam
daughter of eve
as in the Narnia books
we're reading now. 


 

 

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Miracles of the Day

Miracles abound. I have been so busy and full, out of town and all around this summer. I'm just resettling to a routine at home, deep cleaned my house and my next stop off to another adventure, maybe more. Today I have a full day to myself, looking at the miracles of my life now and always! 

I am ready for what comes. 

Today, as every day I will stay wrapped in the beautiful cloak of the Goddess's light, love, protection, abundance and guidance.  

Thank you for this miracle.

Friday, June 21, 2013

This moment



Graduation Ceremony



Being grateful for the gift of this moment. Today the last day of school, my boy is on the red team, a school-wide collaboration. I love being part of the community and its extension outward. 
My home feels stiff, time to practice sweetness, bringing fragrance and the soft musical tones of the goddess. Fun, following school, paying forward, river ferry adventures with friends. And summer solstice practice. Bring on the adventures of love and light and hold the sweet smell of change.

Inspired both by Soulemama and The Happiness Project.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Not Forcing a Solution

Today I'm focusing on NOT fixing or forcing (my) solutions onto others. This is hard for me, especially regarding my son. Oh and my husband, and oh yeah, with my father too. And my boss; okay, with everyone. It is just difficult for me to just let things go and to NOT try not to fix, solve, help, remind, solve, make an alternative, or simply (try to) change the outcome or perception.

I've been reading the book The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. I am loving her theoretical and systematic approach. It is such a great way to see a reflection on my life, my approach and system.  I highly recommend it. It gives me great hope and insight.

I  am seeing I spend too much time worrying about the past, the future, outcomes, forethought and planning that I am wasting a lot of time and energy NOT being in the moment, in my own heart, my own feelings and my own dreams. Today I declare to stay inside my heart, in this moment, now.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Treasure Map 2013

Treasure Map 2013


This map is set over a 9 square grid like a octagonal bagua.





List climbing up the Ladder:
Meditate
Yoga
Breathe
12 Steps
Practicing peace
Kindness 
Patience
Love
Self Reflection
Awareness
Faith
Gratitude

Friday, March 29, 2013

Transition



botanical garden greenhouse

This time is so loaded, 
brimming-over-the-top loaded 
with transition, change, flux.

Spring Equinox, Passover, Easter, Aries new moon all coming or just past.

I am deep in flux internally, emotionally; 
anxious for change and new life. 

There is much fear, rather than excitement in that anxiety. Even confusion and doubt. I am seeking self examination, answers, forgiveness. Forgiveness in my own heart.

The new warmth of these past few days and the crisp light and blue skies are giving me power and strength. I've been yearning for nature and blooming. For results. During this week of spring break, we have visited the botanical garden, not yet blooming, and the Macy's flower show, in full bloom. I'm still not fully satisfied. Even my kitchen garden has produced new beautiful blooms. And yet I'm still yearning and anxious for the full production of love and joy that spring will hopefully bring to my broken heart.


botanical garden
Flower Show

Kitchen Garden