"...It's been sooo long since..." plays like a show tune

The images are from Korea.  It has been a month since we've returned, it feels distant, as it did then. I maybe leaving out some important visual punctuation in this story, but I guess I can save it for later.

I have these few minutes, alone, my child sleeps, my man is out. I am joyful though tired. A short path is visible in front of me. Let me keep my eyes fixed on my feet, the place I am. Our return to that distant hillside is near.

in, like a lion

the piles of ice and snow still towering.

i am ready for spring to come. hello February. March..:coming soon.

i feel steady, grounded, grateful, strong.
the road pulls me.
i see light.
i see the hoops of fire i must pass through, the coals i must walk over.

i am afraid.
but I will
walk and jump, trudge,
flutter and fly

Home again, Home again, Jiggity jig

Though I feel like I am in a foreign country
I'm Home again, Home again, Jiggity jig

Almost Home

I feel much relief. I guess the stars moved or the moon waned (or waxed) just enough. I can see the light, faintly glimmering, at the end of this tunnel.

(i am still not fully comfortable speaking entirely free here)

I met a man who gave me great news.
I walk my path, in faith that it will lead me to a place far beyond my wildest dreams. Somehow I am seeing new rivers.
I've had great gifts this month, love, connection, health, peace, and hope, among other things.

Home is near.

Walking in the shoes

Super hero shoes

Time and space are all mixed up. Can't find a connection to my life at home or myself in many ways. 2011 time. I am in a time warp, in a space age, luxury apartment in another world. My child is disconnected too. He is full of media- games, cartoons, movies. Too cold to go out for long. It is below zero and then the wind colder still.

We are here and now. Without much sense of what will come or the future plans. This rather sudden illness has taken the largest precedent over everything else we had planned for this trip. My mother-in-law is very ill, though her recovery is better each day since her surgery. We are here at this time and space, in this life.

Gumi ROK

  

It makes me appreciate the small things. The great gifts we have, the great food, the gifts of love. That is, if I can allow myself to enjoy the moment rather than worrying about who or what I am or am not, what or how child is behaving and, worst of all,- worrying about what others need or don't need and I am unable to understand. How crazy is that? I'll just try to stay with the appreciation , the gratitude of today and not  the "am"s or "am not"s. That is my personal committment on this day.

Closing 2010

Closing the year in great style with an abundance of love, gratitude and joy!

We used to follow a New Year ritual of greeting the rising sun of the New Year and offer our thanks and prayer coming year. We often brought offerings of plenty. That requires either staying up or waking up early enough,  to travel to beach - Coney Island or Rockaway- and  braving the cold wind and weather to watch the rising sun.  My Honey was even interviewed by the local newpaper in one of those ventures.

We haven't practiced that ritual for the past 3 years. One year we were away and not near a beach. And the following years have been too too difficult to venture with our small son. We are considering  bringing in the New Year in this way again for 2011. 

As for now I am preparing my prayers of gratitude for what 2010 has brought to me and the petition prayers for what I wish 2011 to bring.

Twas the day before...

Twas the day before Christmas

 

 

 

Wishing all the little and big children a day and night of sweet and magical dreams to be awakened, meditated and shared and to make their way to come through as we close the year and begin the next.